How do I ask someone to be a reference and who should I choose?

Welcome to pressing questions,Fast companyWork life advice column. Every week, deputy editor Kathleen Davis, manager of theThe New Way We Workpodcast, will answer the workplace’s biggest and most pressing questions.
Question: How do I ask someone to be a reference and who should I choose?
A: Choosing the right referral is a really important part of the job hunting process. A good person saying the right things about you can tip the scales in your favor when a hiring manager is trying to decide between you and another candidate.
Don’t put all your eggs in one basket
My first piece of advice is to have more than one person in mind. Like most things in life, it’s good to diversify your portfolio. If you have one person you want to be your reference, what will you do if they refuse?
Even if that one person says yes, chances are you’re applying for more than one role—how willing do you think you are to give a quality answer the tenth time you’re asked? Can one person really talk about everything you want to highlight to a potential employer? So, rather than starting with one person in mind, make a list of the top five people you might ask.
You can ask him
As Fast company Contributor Jill Goldenziel pointed out in a recent article about asking for recommendations, your recommenders should be people who know you well. “It’s more important to have a direct supervisor than a CEO, or a professor who got four grades on your papers instead of a Nobel Prize who taught at your school,” he said. “The reference is about you—not how impressive your recommender is.”
When deciding who to ask, don’t think outside the box. Most people think of managers and professors as the go-to sources for recommendations, but it’s possible that your colleagues and peers may have more valuable information and know your work intimately. To get an honest opinion of your particular hiring managers they will do this leg work themselves by looking up your former colleagues on LinkedIn and reaching out.
There are other bonuses to asking your colleagues to be your reference:
1. They probably aren’t asked to provide references very often, so they might be more apt to say yes.
2. If you apply for a job while you are still working and you trust him, you can have someone who can talk about how you are working now.
How to ask
The most important thing you can do is make it as easy as possible for your reference. Start by giving as much lead time as possible. Reach out a few weeks in advance, especially if you’re asking for written recommendations. If it’s been a while since you’ve talked to them, don’t jump right into the question and make sure you reconnect first. (Here are some examples of what to say.)
It’s also important to give them as much information as possible so they feel prepared: If you’re changing jobs or if the roles you’re applying for are focused on a specific skill, let your reference know what to highlight.
Once you get a “yes” from a few people on your list, be sure to shop around for different applications so you don’t bore anyone.
Don’t forget to give thanks
I’ve talked about my situation after a thank you interview in the past. It is equally important to follow up with thanks to your referrals every time they are contacted. Undoubtedly, they are doing a favor that they are not obligated or paid for. They may be the key to your next move. The least you can do is send them a few sentences to say thank you.
Need more advice on asking for a reference? Here it is:
- How to ask someone to send you a job (without annoying them)
- Having trouble choosing directions? Here’s what to ask your network
- The dos and don’ts of job references
- Need a reference? Use one of these five templates
- 4 tips for asking for a recommendation from someone you’ve lost touch with
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