Make this simple mindset shift to reject negativity and stay focused on success

We all love summer time. Long days. A warm evening. Wind in the trees. An opportunity to visit distant places. We love summer until everything we love about it is erased from our minds by the scorching hot sun and oppressive humidity.

So, we do what we do best: Ignore the sweetness of the fruit to curse the bitterness of the pits.

It’s human nature, right? You may have heard the story of the college professor who showed his class a white sheet of paper with a single black dot on it. He instructed his students to write a paragraph describing what they saw.

Others describe the type of dot or its location on the page. Others think philosophically, pondering the eternal existence of darkness entering the light. Some were poetic, lamenting the impermanence of life.

After reading their answers, the professor said: “Each of you chose to focus on one black dot, which represents less than one percent of the page. None of you have ever thought about the whiteness of paper, which remains pure except for a small area.”

What is it that compels us to focus on the dark side? Viewing suggests that it is a choice we have learned to make through practice, the way we fix a hangnail or a crooked picture. And if so, then it’s a habit we can break with a change of mind—a small measure of common sense and self-control.

Change your attitude when it rains, to appreciate the water that keeps the earth alive despite the wetness. If it snows, be grateful for the day off from school or work instead of getting angry about the cold. And when the summer sun goes down, give thanks for having air-conditioning while paying tribute to previous generations who survived without you for thousands of years.

Then, after you get used to the artificially generated cold, dry air inside your home, make a change of mind when you step out onto your balcony to enjoy the first moments of light and warmth. As you do, ponder this week’s addition to the Ethical Lexicon:

Apricot (to agree /app-rə-kate) verb

Basking in the sun 

Name apricot derived from the Latin language periodwhich means “to reveal, reveal, or uncover.” Most interesting, however, is the Spanish derivation abrigo again abrigadowhich it means the exact opposite: “covered, protected, or protected.”

On the other hand, sunlight reveals and exposes. It drives away the darkness of night, literally, and the twilight of confusion, figuratively. On the other hand, the sun gives us shelter and protection from the cold by warming us in the bitter literal and figurative winter.

How should we relate to the sun (or anything else)? Usually it’s up to us. With a change of attitude, we can enjoy its light and warmth rather than obsess over its less pleasant aspects.

In my book The beauty of the proverbI recount my first encounter with the now famous psychological experiment conducted by Christopher Chabris and Daniel Simons at Harvard University. You may have seen their video, where several people pass basketballs back and forth. Spectators are instructed to count how many times the players in the white shirt pass the ball.

The video ends, and a caption appears on the screen. It reads as follows: The correct answer is 15 passes. Have you seen a gorilla? 

I’m one of the 50% who failed to see a man in a gorilla suit walk through the crowd, face the camera, thump his chest, and walk out of sight. The amazing lesson is that we see what we want and we don’t see what we’re not looking for.

It works in the same way as attitude. A positive attitude change can literally change our perception of reality.

That’s what you do not It means Pollyanna. Ignoring problems by pretending everything is wonderful is a recipe for disaster. On the other hand, focusing on problems without seeing the big picture encourages us to catastrophize, leading to self-destruction, a self-fulfilling prophecy.

This is especially evident in politics: Liberals tend to focus on a better world that could be, while conservatives focus on a better world that has been. Often times, both end up going against everything that is good in the world as it is, which accelerates the progression of social disintegration and cultural upheaval.

In business, it’s exactly the same. The cries of darkness and doom create a toxic fog of hopelessness, helplessness, and sadness. Conversely, if you celebrate wins with an eye toward continuous improvement you create a strong and energetic culture.

Making a balance between appreciation what is good and your desireit would be better it does not involve mind games or double thinking. It just takes being aware of what works and thinking about building on what we already have.

That is why leaders must promote a spirit of gratitude and transparency. Here are three simple strategies for just that:

• Create creative and ongoing ways to show employees and team members appreciation for their efforts and contributions.

• Set gentle but constant reminders that celebrate the positive aspects of your culture.

• Ask for input on pending decisions, and explain why and how those decisions were made.

King Solomon teaches: As water sees the face of another, so does the heart of a person. The more we focus on seeing the good, the more good we reflect on those around us. And when we show the good in our world to others, they will show that good in us.