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How to be a good leader according to USWNT coach Emma Hayes

What is leadership? Good question.

For others, it involves tapping into a fortune bag of motivational quotes from great speakers and trying to find personal balance. For others, it requires the comfort blanket of a program that has worked for someone else in the same field.

All leaders eat bits and pieces. There is nothing wrong with that, but to me the essence of leadership is understanding your team and how your organization works. It depends on the application of the good qualities that come together, how the people of our group, company, or department behave according to our values ​​and our collective goals. It means knowing what to do, when to do it, and why to do it.

It doesn’t matter if you run an office, run a production line, or coach a top sports team. Your main role is to help, manage the project. I consider myself a general contractor.

I build the house in a high level way, knowing that the ground can suddenly shift under my feet. Work is full of daily hardships. I have to coordinate a diverse group of highly skilled employees. I have to saw and remove the coasters that cut the corners. Principles are the stones of my foundation.

I oversaw architectural plans. They must be accurate, but they are not holy. They can be amended, subtly, if the need arises. There are many different challenges, and some of them you don’t see coming. Your real-time feedback is key to keeping everyone on track. People often say that it is easy to do with experience, without explaining what experience is.

Learn from failure

I believe that knowledge refers to wisdom, which is gathered through failure. Experience is how we overcome the curve balls thrown our way that develop our creativity and resilience as leaders. However, I see very few people and organizations using those lessons successfully. That does not mean lack of commitment, but rather confusion about the nature of the work.

Leadership is losing power. You must always listen well, speak clearly, and think wisely. You have to have a deep understanding of the human condition and be hyper-aware of what makes people tick. Don’t think about anything. The range of motivations for your employees is surprisingly wide. Age is something that can creep up on you. Speaking of which, I teach tntysomethings. Our social and cultural points are different. My understanding of them must constantly change as I grow and the world around us changes.

In my business, the iconic players of the previous generation are losing their relevance very quickly. No disrespect intended, and I can see that this would be considered a rebellion on Merseyside, but most kids today would have no idea who Kenny Dalglish is. It is my job to bring the generations together and find timely examples of excellence to expand upon. I can do that while staying true to old school principles because when it comes to teaching and learning there are eternal truths. For example, I live by the motto, “Stand up, and live it every day.” It may not be fashionable, but it works for me.

Everyday examples make the best points. For example, why do so many people commit speeding offences? Because they were drunk or trying to go somewhere fast? You would think so, but most of the time it is because they lose concentration.

They are on the normal route, on autopilot. (I should know. I got my speeding tickets on the road I use every day.) But when you’re on a new road, in a different place with new landmarks, you don’t make the same mistakes. In life there is always more than one path to take, and it is my job to guide my people down different paths. It’s a simple principle: if you want a different result next time, take a different road. If your workshops or group building activities are generating stale responses, try a new format or venue.


Excerpted with permission from A Whole Different Game: My Leadership Playbook by Emma Hayes with contributions by Michael Calvin. Copyright © 2024. Available from PublicAffairs, an imprint of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

Emma Hayes is the head coach of the US Women’s Soccer Team. She was the long-time coach of Chelsea FC, one of the most successful women’s clubs in Europe. He has led Chelsea FC to two domestic league and cup doubles, as well as one trophy since taking over the club in 2012.


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